When I was 15, I was in the local Lion's Club Speech contest. The topic was global warming. I had a great speech. It had it all. Statistics. Passion. Humor. It was 10 minutes long. And I had it memorized cold. I could do it in my sleep.
Two minutes into it at showtime, I choked.
Silence. Coughing. Microphone feedback. I still remember how visceral it was. I broke out in sweat. My ears were ringing. My stomach fell through my feet. The room spun. I couldn't get enough air. I was humiliated. Angry at myself because I knew this content! After a prolonged pause I couldn't bear any longer, I apologized to the audience and ran from the building in tears. A friend chased me down and held me while I sobbed.
After I caught my breath, he said, "If you don't go back in there and give your speech again, you're going to regret it for the rest of your life."
Not a bad insight for a fellow 15 year-old.
I went back in. I listened to the rest of the contestants and applauded when they picked the winner. And I was allowed to give my speech with my index cards. Ironically, my fear had passed and I didn't use them.
I rocked it. Floored them. I got a standing ovation. Apparently, middle-aged Lions love a teenage comeback story. Dozens came up to me afterwards and told me I would have taken first place.
The official winner went all the way to nationals. And placed second.
The fear of public speaking is something I have worked deliberately over the years to conquer. I dove into the Rotary speech contest later that year in high school and placed regionally. I ran and won a place in student government. I took acting in college. I joined associations in my industry and gave presentations at work.
I went back to school after establishing my career. And I was the commencement speaker for the UC Davis Graduate School of Management when I completed my MBA and again a couple times as the President of the Alumni Board. Today, I present at company strategic retreats, conferences, and have written CEO remarks for annual meetings.
When I'm in my groove, I speak well. When I misfire, it's probably not as noticeable to others as it is to me. And I can usually find my way back and keep going. Even when the room starts spinning and the nerves creep up, I know I can get through it.
Because I survived that first time.
In the spirit of graduation season, I thought I'd share my MBA commencement speech. The one I rocked. Without index cards or a teleprompter. The one I can still recite.
It's a speech that was 25 years in the making. It's something I can show my 15 year-old son as an example of not letting failure be the end of the story.
And how important it is to have and be a good friend.
Some years ago, I saw my friend at our high school reunion. He introduced me to his wife and I was able to tell her this tale. She looked at him with love and said she wasn't surprised.
Thanks again, Ray.
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One crisp, Fall morning in August 2010, Professor Victor Stango stood before the Working Professional MBA students at our orientation.
He said, “At no other time in your lives will you be stripped away of who you are at home and at work and immersed in such an academically rich environment. This program will push you. It won’t always be comfortable. But in the end, you will be the best possible version of yourselves. This program will change your life.”
Ladies and gentleman, I’d like you to find your graduate in your line of sight in the risers if you would please.
Now you tell me. Doesn’t looking at your graduate today feel like looking at the sun?
I wish we could bottle how we feel today. Bottle it and tap into it during times of personal and professional adversity. We are filled with such elation, such relief. Today is tangible proof that if you set your sights on a goal, and relentlessly chip away at it, years later, you can succeed.
I am honored today to be the designated speaker on behalf of the Sacramento Working Professional graduates. As Working Professionals, we didn’t come straight to business school after undergrad. We went to work. We started our lives. Many of us got married. Many of us have children.
And yet, we asked ourselves one of the most powerful questions in the English language. "What if?"
What if instead of doing this job I’ve always done, I went back to school? What if I could do everything better? What if I learned how to do something entirely different?
So we studied up and took the GMAT, and boy wasn’t that a good time. We evaluated the business schools available to us and eventually, we collectively decided...
“Berkeley schmerkeley, I’m going to UC Davis.”
Just like we were warned, we were pushed. We’ve been working hard these past years. We were instructed by what is undoubtedly one of the most talented and passionate business school faculties in the world.
But it wasn’t just the faculty that shaped us. We have borne witness to one another and moments of sheer brilliance. I think each of us can remember a moment, when we’ve glimpsed each others’ true calling.
For instance, I can remember in a group project, being simply blown away by how clearly a colleague could see a company’s personality in its financial statements. Or when a cohort explained predictive regression analysis as naturally as a fish in water. Or when a fellow student’s poise, polish, and presentation content rivaled what we see in global Ted Talks class after class.
Each of us are gifted in different ways and we have helped shape one another.
I am so very grateful, to have taken this program, with this faculty, with exactly this composite of students, at exactly this time in my life. We are indeed the best versions of ourselves so far, thanks to many factors, but also thanks to each other. This journey is complete. Another one begins.
Today, the question changes from, “What if?” to “What now?” It would be easy to revert back to a former, less courageous, version of ourselves. Maybe we should pass on that pursuit that lights us up inside for something more stable for now. Maybe we should find a responsible, professional choice, something safe.
I suggest that we reframe the question, from “What now?” to “Why not?” Time is going to pass anyway. We might as well do something spectacular with it. And if this generation of MBA graduates knows one thing, it's that there is no such thing as a safe company.
Besides, there is no greater strife, no greater reward, than being crystal clear on you're good at, where you lack, and with that, forging a path in pursuit of your dreams.
I know I will never be a CFO. And I’m okay with that. Because I know what I'm looking for when I hire one.
Renowned civil rights leader and American author Howard Thurman said it much more eloquently than I. He said, “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
So fellow graduates. Find it. Find your calling. Find that spark, that fire, that light, that thing that makes you radiate joy. Find that next ambitious pursuit that makes you glow and shine from within. Its flavor is unmistakable. You’ll know you’re on the right track when you’re reminded of how you feel today, right now, in this moment.
Find it. And shine on baby.
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